I'm coming out of the bad mom closet.

There as some views on motherhood and mommy practices I have that other women just cringe at. I find this fascinating. I think the way I do "mommying" works for my family and for me, and that's all that matters. But every once in a while I get a comment that just shocks me. I'm not way out there in left field or anything, so I get surprised.

I figured I'd put it all down on paper, so to speak, to see what other women think of these things. If you'd like to comment, I welcome your comments. Good or bad! I like to know what other people think. I'll never change what I do, but it's interesting to hear other viewpoints.

I find breastfeeding gross. I've only had one other friend who shares my viewpoint on this. It makes me cringe to see another woman pull out a boob in public. I feel like if you choose to do it, it should be private. When I did it, I kept it very private, and I'm one of the least modest people I know.
I breast fed Mitch for six weeks, and it was just dreadful. It felt gross. I actually wanted to do it and looked forward to the experience before he was born. I was insistent on breast feeding. Then, as soon as I started doing it, I felt disgusting.
It made me sweat. I couldn't stand the way it felt when the milk left my body. My breasts just ached constantly. He had to eat every 15 minutes because he was such a large and hungry baby, and I became engorged. Pumping hurt. Everything in the general area was constantly in pain. I just didn't enjoy it at all. But seriously, the worst part was that it made me sweat. I know I already mentioned it, but it just got worse and worse as time went by. It felt like flu sweat. Like I was sweating out all the toxins in my body, but there were just too many toxins.

I spank. When some people hear this, they picture me beating my children with an aluminum bat. Other people realize what I actually do, which is spank only when the punishment fits the crime. For instance, the last time my 8-year-old was spanked was longer ago than I can remember. This is because spanking worked with him. I'm not saying it works with every child, because it doesn't. Every child is different and responds to different forms of punishment.
The babies are too young to spank. They do, however, get a pop on the hand when they touch stuff and grab stuff they're not supposed to. They get it done immediately with a firm "no" to go along with it. This is reinforcing what the word no means while at the same time giving them a consequence when they do something they're not supposed to do. They then equate touching the cable box, for instance, with getting their hands popped.
My son is a very well-behaved and well-mannered child. I credit my discipline strategy for that. I fully expect never to have to spank him again because the older he gets the less he needs it. For minor infractions, we do "consequences".  We take away his video games and tv time. That works much better than spanking at this point!

I really don't care about germs. My kids can put their mouths on almost anything they want, short of a stranger's skin. Chewing on the shopping cart bar? No biggie.
I don't wash the babies' hands before they eat. They're 1. They have their hands in their mouths every second of every day. What about eating makes it any different? My grandmother freaks out when I do this. It almost makes me laugh, poor woman. She thinks this is such a serious thing.

I think cloth diapering is ridiculous. And I say so readily. Why would you spend the time cloth diapering when there are disposable diapers you can throw away? Poop is so nasty. To me, there are lots of ways you can do your part to help the environment, but my goodness. That's just not one I'll spend time on. We've come a long way over the years. Let's use the efficient things that have been developed. In my mind it's like saying instead of using a sanitary pad you should wad a towel up in your pants.

I find the childbirth experience unnatural and disgusting. I've done it both ways: vaginal birth and c-section. People think I'm crazy when I say the C-section was easier than the vaginal birth, but I wholeheartedly believe that for me, it was. Maybe not for everyone, but for me, yes.
I don't understand women who do this at home. There are women in my life I love and respect who have done this, and I think they're crazy. Why on earth would you NOT want a doctor around when your child is born? What if something is wrong with it? When I say this, women come back with the response that for centuries women did it without doctors. My response is that for centuries, babies died. Now, it's not necessary for babies to die. I know that if you're careful and have someone there who knows what he/she is doing, it cuts down on the risk, but I'm just not a risk taker. And seriously, I have never gotten a sense of euphoria from giving birth. A sense of pain and wanting tons of medication and three fingers of bourbon afterward, yeah, but euphoria? Nope.

These are my confessions. Ha! Take them as you will. I yam who I yam.